TEN PILATES

A couple of weeks ago I got the shock of my life. I weighed myself, it was the first time in 7 years and I realised that I have literally doubled in size since I was 19. The funny thing is I was super sporty at school and used to be really active. I was captain of everything from volleyball to basketball, I can shake my ass on the dance floor and I was the London Girls Inter school Junior Fencing Champion (don’t laugh). From university like it is for many of us it was a slippery slope, until it got to the point where I spent my days looking at E! news, The Hills while sitting at my laptop eating slices of Victoria Sponge that was 2 weeks ago by the way (oh happy days).

Therefore it shouldn’t have been such as shock but it was. My husband says I have body dysmorphia because when I look in the mirror I see Britney Spears circa 2001 in her “I’m a slave for you” video (anyone who knows me will be pissing themselves). Let’s put it this way, when I get offered a seat on the bus, I think it’s because I’m hot and still got it and they think it’s because I’m a few months gone.

Anyway, I’ve decided to do something about it and took myself off tonight to my very first Reformer Pilates class at Ten Pilates, www.tenpilates.com, which have studios in Mayfair, Notting Hill and Chiswick.

I can be very OCD about new places and didn’t know if I would like pilates to be honest. I dislike yoga, as I think it’s for bedwetters, I’m sorry my darlings I do, what’s all that downward dog business- I’m an angry black woman and I need to kick the shit out of something in a boxercise/ thai kickboxing stylee.

However, I was really pleased to find Ten Pilates was all zen, with clean lines white washed walls, wood floors and Diptyque candles scattered everywhere (oooowww very posh and classy, me likey). The studio was airy and air conditioned and was super clean even for by my OCD standards. The instructor was brilliant, really sweet and made me feel at ease and that I could take things at my own pace. The class is never more than 10, which is good as you feel you get a lot of individual care and attention. I liked the fact I didn’t get all hot and bothered and sweaty but had a deep sweet burn and I know I’m going to feel this tomorrow. I feel like my body has been bitch slapped but in a good way, I feel alive boooyayyyy!

At the end of the class I had a gentle tap on my shoulder and it was a really sweet super star global stylist from John Frieda who I know. They were also there in the class but in the back so I couldn’t see. A wall of shame hit me, as I was trying to think if I had grunted and growled my way through the session like some kind of mad dog in heat? Oh well. I will definitely go again. I can feel myself standing straighter and being aware of my core even after one session and I loved all the leg pulley things, it felt a bit scandalous. Feel the burn baby grrrrrrrr.